Begrudging Repentance

11 Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. 12 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2001). (Heb 4:11–13). Wheaton: Standard Bible Society.

Ever find yourself falling back into the same sin over and over? You know you shouldn’t, but you do it anyway? After a while you try not to make eye contact and, when in prayer, you give it cursory attention asking for only cursory forgiveness?

We all do. We all do things we do not even think should be treated as sin, but we quietly know they are sin. Here’s the thing though — God knows it is sin and he is not going to treat it as cursory or ancillary. The sin you don’t want to give up is the sin you are putting ahead of your relationship with God. That sin has become your idol.

God can discern your thoughts and intentions. He knows when you really are not as penitent as you should be. One day you will be held to account.

We all have things we do not want to give up. We risk putting our salvation in jeopardy. At some point we have to ask ourselves the tough question — do I want to stay in this sin or move into a closer relationship with God? That question will echo into eternity. However hard it is to give up, we must try. The first step is honesty and admission in conversation with God.

And when we doubt we can do it, just remember one more thing. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13) Rely on Jesus. Cry out to Jesus. Let him help. You do not have to do it alone.