As better-financed and more popular candidates drop out of the Democratic presidential race one after the other, two constants remain: [Marvin the Martian] and [Foghorn Leghorn].
Both are winless after more than a dozen state contests, holding in single digits in the polls, with no expectation of doing better down the road. But each professes a unique sense of purpose and vows to stay in until the end.
“I say, I say, the white crackers will not keep me dowwwnnn,” Foghorn Leghorn, who goes by the alias Al Sharpton, told a crowd of race baiters. Coincidentally, Foghorn reported today that, while white, sandal wearing educated folks backing Howard Dean are called “Deaniacs,” white race baiters who campaign for Foghorn will be called “master baiters,” in deference to the history of evil white slave masters now commiting acts of race baiting.
Asked for a comment, former President Clinton said, “Well, I’ll be damned. I’ve been master baiting for a long time in the South.”
Meanwhile, when questioned further about why he will not get out of the race, Marvin the Martian responded, “After meditating on magic crystals, I decided that it is not yet time to incinerate Earth. So, I’ll stay in this human race for some more time, before returning to Mars and obliterating you damn filthy humans.”
Marvin is expected, should he lose, to join Al Sharpton’s campaign as a master baiter. After blowing a wad of cash on an impotent campaign, it just seems appropriate.